Trash Hash 13 March 2005
Due to the whines and complaints of various Rugger-buggers who wanted
to see the English win the wooden spoon this hash started at damn near
the crack of dawn. Despite that minor problemette most people managed
to show up on time even though Pre-stressed did his best to confuse the
heck out of Riviera
Radio listeners all by pushing the previous run (which started at
11 in Theoule/Mer) instead.
Anyway most of us showed in the car park in La Gaude by 10:30 with just
a couple of late-cummers (e.g. Klingon and Fartybum) failing to show up
on time. The hares annouced that the trail was entirely standard except
that the marked view stop was in fact also the Beer stop and then we
were off. The runners' trail was flat and entirely on roads - NOT. The
trail began with a scenic detour around the sewage works before getting
serious and heading into the shiggy on the old route to Vence. Those
people (Klingon) who really wanted to cross the river were out of luck
as the trail down to it was in fact yet another loop. Impressively the
Rugger-buggers, viz Padre and Pre-stressed, managed to continue their
discussion about England's chances at the wooden spoon despite
scrambling up the hill back to the real trail.
The real trail sort of paralleled the side of the valley and contained
lots of shiggy and a number of walkers who seemed upset that a) they
had to solve some checks - Fartybum managed to mislead a few at one
particular check and b) that the trail was narrower than normal; i.e.
it was single file without passing places but with pickly bushes
instead. Various runners who had been conspicuous by the absence in our
descent to the river also showed up as the pack steadily overhauled the
walkers. Numerous injuries were sustained by hashers with the prize for
most whining going to Big End after she tried to leave her eye on a
thornbush. Astoundingly Sadist was left well behind in the bloody
injury stakes with Klingon sharing honours with a walker (sorry forgot
name) for most damage.
However despite the injuries and slow pace of the walkers eventually
the entire pack emerged into the open at a very scenic spot which
included a scenic Pedo asking what took us all so long. We all wondered
how Pedo had shortcut to this spot sinc he had been notable by his
non-visibility on trail.
Also at this scenic spot was a V implying that Ve Vere at Ve Veer Stop.
Once Cumalot was persuaded to move his vehicle 3 foot so that we could
get stuff out, the beercheck proved to also be a champagne and cake
stop as well to celebrate the fact that the Riviera H3 was celebrating
its 18th Birthday. Worrying to think that the Riviera Hash has now come
of age and thus is able to vote, drink (except in America), marry, have
sex (except with sheep), drive a car and so on.
Eventually the Rugger Buggers and the people who wanted to dine a
restaurant for lunch got us all on the road again for the second half.
And this time it really was a road
Not only was it a road it was a road that passed fascinating animals.
Big End was very interested in an old goat - I wasn't quite clear
whether this was an attempt to compare Padre to the real thing or
whether it was more general.
Meanwhile one of our North British hashers demonstarted the canny
penny-pinching that is so typical of the nation by picking a bouquet of
mimosas from a nearby tree to present to his sweetheart. The suggestion
that the flowers were intended for Big End's goat is something that I
can neither confirm nor deny.
Eventually the trail went off the road for a brief diversion up a hill
of shiggy and back down again. Again it was notable that a number of
hashers somehow seemed to avoid this detour and headed straight in for
the beer.
More fool the short-cutters, because the hares had failed to coordinate
things properly and left the pack standing around in the midday sun
while the beer was fetched from the beer check
Eventually the hares got their shit together and the beer arrived. We
then had a swift circle with numerous downdowns:
Hare : Cum A Lot and Jobsworth
Missing Run report & next scribe : Sadist & Dingus
Non St Patrick's : Pedo & Fly Me
St. Patrick's : Lots of people
Mother's Day : Lots of people
RHHH Birthday : Padre, Pedo & Sadist
Late Comers : Klingon, Mc Goose, Linda, Lindsay & Never Comes
Stand in Hash Cash : Confusion & Supermarket Trolley
Birthdays Absolutely Pathetic and Big End
RHHH Birthday Cake : BIG END
S.O.W. : Cum A Lot for not having any beer at the end of the run,
plus bad planning, plus....
The owner of the
restaurant for not wanting to serve 28 Hashers because we where 5
minutes late!!!!
Because of lack of time the SOW will be awarded at the next run.
Then the hungry headed to the restaurant (and failed to get served
because they were late) and
the rest of us buggered off home
