I just opened, by mistake, one of my spam emails. One offering, I believe, services for men who feel underendowed. However it is hilarious:
From: "Selena U. Munson" To: "Jeanie J. Queen" Subject: I just started having sex, and my boyfriend keeps popping out when we do it.
Ladies always whooped at me and even blokes did in the federal bathroom! Well, now I hee-haw at them, because I took Meg, a dik. for 4 months and now my peter is badly weightier than national. take up http://<address>
Its always amusing when I get an email addressed to my feminine side, although hitherto I'd never realized I was known as Jeanie. Unfortunately it all goes horribly wrong because we change sex in the body of the message.
And then there is the "federal bathroom" bit. I mean does the guy not get "whooped at" in state, city or private bathrooms? And what about having "a peter which is badly weightier than national." National what? and why is it badly weightier? and why would I want to buy something that made my "peter" badly weightier in the first place?
Work on your sales pitch you lamé spamer marooons!