17 November 2006 Blog Home : November 2006 : Permalink
Once upon a time, on a dark and stormy night, on my way home from the editorial offices of Fantasy & Science Fiction, I stumbled across a lovely brass lamp in a mysterious shop. I bought it for a song, only to come home and discover it had a nasty blemish.
Starting to sound familiar yet? Or do you need some more?
I took out a rag and some polish and tried shining it up. Much to my surprise, a genie sprung from the lamp and offered me three wishes. Fed up after a long day of slushing, I blurted out, without thinking, “I wish I never had to listen to another slush writer complain about fast rejections! I wish that I never had to explain the ‘code’of my rejection letter! And I wish that I never had to see another poorly formatted manuscript ever again!” The genie said “Your wish is my command,” and struck me deaf, dumb, and blind.
Does it sound familiar now? Wait, here’s the kicker:
At just that moment I woke up and realized it was all a dream.
Groaning yet?
If you think that’s bad, you should see the slush pile some time. Clichés are the bane of slush readers and editors. They’re more likely to drive us out of the business than the poor wages, the long hours, or the incessant paper cuts. ...